Whiteout video When your child is distraught adults tend to want to make the hurt child feel better as soon as possible. In these scenarios, parents often tell children things like:
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While it is important to let the child know that they are okay and safe, language like this may actually convey to the child that their emotional experiences are invalid or wrong. For example, if a child falls and begins to cry, saying “You’re okay” may sound to the child like they should not feel bad or cry.
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Instead, it may be more beneficial to a child for an adult to label and validate their feelings as well as help them articulate what is they are feeling the way they are. Some examples include:
- “I know that was really scary when you fell.”
- “I know you are sad when Mommy leaves but I will come back at the end of the day.”
Munich download Examples like these help the child identify the feelings they are experiencing, remind them that it is okay to feel that way, and provide them an opportunity to both correct you if that is not the reason they are upset and leave the door open to talk about what’s bothering them in more detail.