Parents have several important responsibilities among them; to protect children and keep them safe and to help children grow and become independent. As Hodding Carter noted, “There are two lasting bequests we can give our children, one is roots, and the other is wings.”
While it comes naturally for parents to keep their children out of harms way, promoting children’s independence can be a more daunting task. We can encourage independence, self-reliance and promote positive self – esteem in young children by involving them in household tasks. This helps children make valuable contributions to family life.
Involving children in household chores:
- Increases family togetherness
- Helps children acquire new skills and gain new masteries that promote healthy self-esteem.
- Enables children to experience first-hand what it means to be a family “producer” rather than simply a family “consumer.”
- Helps children learn from an early age that real work is fun and rewarding.
- Nurtures young children’s natural desire to feel useful and/or helpful.
When encouraging young children to participate in “real” work efforts, chores should always be developmentally appropriate and adapted to a youngster’s interests and abilities. The following suggestions can serve as a helpful guideline.
- Notice what adult behaviors children are imitating, especially those related to adult tasks.
- Always involve children in deciding what tasks they would like to do; greater input typically equates to greater buy-in!
- Help children learn how to do a given task before they attempt it on their own.
- Divide larger jobs into smaller and more manageable parts. For example, when sorting laundry, first have your child pick out all the socks and then introduce the idea of finding matching pairs.
- Encourage and reinforce children’s efforts. While their standards may not be the same as an adult’s, resist redoing a task a child has already completed.
- Avoid communicating that tasks are boring and need to be endured. Children have a propensity for mimicking adult behavior and manifesting adult attitudes.
- Acknowledge children’s accomplishments with very specific praise. For example, “Setting the table allowed us to sit down and eat together as soon as dinner was ready; that was helpful, thank you!”
Children want to be a part of the adult world just as much as they want adults to share their world. If children are encouraged to contribute their efforts in accomplishing appropriate tasks at home, the lives of both parents and children become enriched.